Being Me

So, I'm doing a 90-day journey to renewing spirit, soul and body. I am becoming the woman I want to be. There is scripture, prayers, writing, exercises, diet and affirmations. It's really a very cool book with all you need in one neat little package. Here's my problem, I don't want to take 90 days to become the woman I want to be - I just want to be that woman now. In my haste, I blew through the first exercise where we are to write down 25 things we want to have, do and be. I wrote that I want to have good relationships with my family; I want to do fun, spirit filled things with family and friends; I want to be a source of joy to those I love. I had 22 lines left after that so I filled in the names of the people I love. The next day I had to write down the top 5 things on my list, so I wrote out 5 names (changed here to protect the innocent) Billy, Bobby, Betty, Barb and Beth - the people I love most. The next day I had to write the list on an index card. I wrote Billy, Bobby, Betty, Barb and Beth on a bright orange index card. The next day I had to tape the card somewhere I would see it every day. So I taped it inside the bathroom mirror - Billy, Bobby, Betty, Barb and Beth. Today, I discovered that the things written on the index card are my future me! I love Billy, Bobby, Betty, Barb and Beth but I don't want to be them! I just want to be me . . . only better. Back to page one - augh - it ain't easy being me.